What's that coming down the chimney? Batteries? Chapstick?

 
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Marcus Brody
The Dog


Joined: 09 Jan 2004
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Location: floating bumpercar

PostPosted: Fri Sep 27, 2019 3:34 pm    Post subject: What's that coming down the chimney? Batteries? Chapstick? Reply with quote

Yes! All those things, and so much more!

It's Santa: a hulking, grotesque amalgamation of things that happen to be sitting on Mark's desk! With his big boots made of 50mcg vitamin D softgels, his shiny nail-clippers belt buckle, fidget spinner beard, and twinkling eyes made of Original Flavor Tridentâ„¢, he's the perfect trash-chimera to get eeeeeveryone in the spirit of the holidays!

Come back, kids! Santa won't hurt you! He just wants you to sit on his lap made of a stack of old college textbooks propping up a monitor, and give you toys from his ceramic jar full of cheap Chinese fountain pens!

What do you want for Christmas this year, little girl? A pony? Well, Santa doesn't have one of those! How about some cinnamon flavored toothpicks and a 256mb flash drive from 2003? There you go! Merry Christmas!

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Bulkoth
Whitest Forumer


Joined: 11 Jan 2004
Posts: 7668
Location: State College

PostPosted: Sat Sep 28, 2019 1:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

https://ksr-ugc.imgix.net/assets/025/936/108/eb0c442cbbc64906a4bf89cfc14b3c8e_original.jpg?ixlib=rb-2.1.0&w=700&fit=max&v=1564162639&auto=format&gif-q=50&q=92&s=f46decb3fbabb0bc9285dcab90567aba

This didn't want to work with the image tag, but it came to mind reading the above.

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